Relationships Benefit From A Little Consideration
After 24 years of life (yes, I know, it’s really not that long, but indulge me) I have come to the conclusion that we as human beings are prone to being naturally inconsiderate.
It’s easy to get caught up in the I’s and Me’s when moving through life without considering the way that your actions are impacting others. Sometimes things fly right out of my mouth before I consider that what I’m saying might be insensitive or hurtful to the receiving party. Everyone has these little moments, but when these little moments build up over time in a relationship they can go from little moments to big fights. Man, woman or otherwise everyone really wants the same basic things in a relationship: to feel important, to feel understood and to feel wanted/needed. When we act inconsiderately in a relationship, despite intent, we make the other person feel as though they’re missing some or all of those desires. While this may go on unnoticed or just ignored for some time, eventually the feelings of unfulfillment are going to come to a head and the offended party is going to speak up, if not just leave. So unless you’re happy to be in a relationship with yourself only, you better start paying attention to your inconsiderate tendencies. Often this can be fixed by simply paying closer attention to what you’re partner is saying. That’s right: it’s as easy as listening. Also be prepared to do some self-negotiating. You can’t always have it your way, although we seem to be hardwired these days to seek self-satisfaction. Every now and then, on matters that won’t shatter your self-worth or relationship, let the other guy/girl win and get their way. You might have to watch a few movies that aren’t your style, endure a ballet or sporting event, or visit in-laws for a few extra days. But the effect on your relationship will be well worth the concession.
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